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Blogs > infinitepoetess > Poetic Pussy Craft |
The Social Conundrum It seems people have forgotten social graces in public. It is my guess that all it took was a pandemic and rioting in the streets to seal the deal of the long awaited exodus from society's norm. I mean we have seen the Karen's of the world losing their shit in racial rages and others losing their marbles day by day... I went to my first social in Denver and it was surreal. Perhaps it is merely a social distancing and social changes growing pain...Or at least that's all I hope was the issue. Not one person besides the owner and the DM spoke to me in an hour and a half. The attendees were all huddled together in little cliquish groups with not a smile to give or a hello to offer. I left and reminisced on my way home about my very first dungeon visit in NC and how the people there were like coming home to a family I had never known. Let's hope this was just an off night and I can return one day to find a new family. Although, there is something to be said for southern hospitality and I am hoping that my old family in NC aren't the only ones with some hospitality left in them. But, it does lend to the question of whether we will all ever return to normalcy of any sort in social structures? What do you think? How would you react? Song addition for this post People's Parties/Same Situation - Joni Mitchell |
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People's Parties Joni Mitchell All the people at this party They've got a lot of style They've got stamps of many countries They've got passport smiles Some are friendly Some are cutting Some are watching it from the wings Some are standing in the centre Giving to get something Photo Beauty gets attention Then her eye paint's running down She's got a rose in her teeth And a lampshade crown One minute she's so happy Then she's crying on someone's knee Saying, laughing and crying You know it's the same release I told you when I met you I was crazy Cry for us all, Beauty Cry for Eddie in the corner Thinking he's nobody And Jack behind his joker And stone-cold Grace behind her fan And me in my frightened silence Thinking I don't understand I feel like I'm sleeping Can you wake me? You seem to have a broader sensibility I'm just living on nerves and feelings With a weak and a lazy mind And coming to people's parties Fumbling deaf dumb and blind I wish I had more sense of humor Keeping the sadness at bay Throwing the lightness on these things Laughing it all away Laughing it all away Laughing it all away
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I hope it's just the sign of the times and life can resume to at least somewhat normal.
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If I was a 'regular' attendee I would have at least greeted you Infini. It is only polite to welcome new people to a group. I have not been to a munch/slosh in almost 10 years because of the bullshit cliques and politics, and quite frankly, they are made up of mostly couples, so not many singles there and if women are, everyone else is on them like sprinkles on a donut! I prefer to keep to myself the first one or two times I have gone, and just try to get a vibe from the people.
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The last munch I went to was about 5 years ago. It was a munch group i was not a regular member of. I had moved to Wisconsin and frankly, was too busy with work to go with regularity go to anything. It was a pretty cold group. I was an outsider. I never went back. "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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Slave rick
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6/15/2020 6:56 pm |
sounds like a bunch of pussies...nothing like someone saying hello... perhaps you should consider yourself lucky. I'm used to managing a team so I'm generally more outgoing and I would have approached them. Being a dominant male. I have more options available. I would have interacted before leaving. If someone hasn't spoken to you in 20 minutes then its time to go. . I'm not going to stay where I'm not wanted. You were a new guest and their behavior was demonstrative as to how welcome you were. I'll walk over and talk to anyone without any preconceptions or expectations except for friendly conversation. I would carefully reflect on the events of that night before going back. First impressions do mean a lot.
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What a shame. In your last post, you were so positive about the prospects of this meeting. Having never been to one of these gatherings I was looking forward to your telling of the events. Is that a pic of the place? I would have imagined a larger room.
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If I was a 'regular' attendee I would have at least greeted you Infini. It is only polite to welcome new people to a group. I have not been to a munch/slosh in almost 10 years because of the bullshit cliques and politics, and quite frankly, they are made up of mostly couples, so not many singles there and if women are, everyone else is on them like sprinkles on a donut! I prefer to keep to myself the first one or two times I have gone, and just try to get a vibe from the people.
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The last munch I went to was about 5 years ago. It was a munch group i was not a regular member of. I had moved to Wisconsin and frankly, was too busy with work to go with regularity go to anything. It was a pretty cold group. I was an outsider. I never went back.
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sounds like a bunch of pussies...nothing like someone saying hello... perhaps you should consider yourself lucky. I'm used to managing a team so I'm generally more outgoing and I would have approached them. Being a dominant male. I have more options available. I would have interacted before leaving. If someone hasn't spoken to you in 20 minutes then its time to go. . I'm not going to stay where I'm not wanted. You were a new guest and their behavior was demonstrative as to how welcome you were. I'll walk over and talk to anyone without any preconceptions or expectations except for friendly conversation. I would carefully reflect on the events of that night before going back. First impressions do mean a lot.
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poetess That is VERY sad! Even with distancing, we can talk and be polite.... I hope the next one is better... A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
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It's a shame that people don't extend the hand of hospitality. Perhaps the turnout is a sign of this pandemic time and not the mainstream. Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.
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I hope it's just the sign of the times and life can resume to at least somewhat normal.
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WOG!
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What a shame. In your last post, you were so positive about the prospects of this meeting. Having never been to one of these gatherings I was looking forward to your telling of the events. Is that a pic of the place? I would have imagined a larger room. I have been to a lot of parties, socials, etc over the years. As explained my first club I visited will always remain my favorite. The people were just so warm and welcoming, but they were all southern and full of hospitality. Not sure I will ever find such again, and thats ok
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poetess That is VERY sad! Even with distancing, we can talk and be polite.... I hope the next one is better...
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It's a shame that people don't extend the hand of hospitality. Perhaps the turnout is a sign of this pandemic time and not the mainstream.
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Cuddles, hugs, squeezes,....gropes Thank you babe
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Hello N, I went to a social here about two years ago and had the exact experience you did. I have not been back. It left me feeling...... I don't think I can find the word. All my best L
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Hello N, I went to a social here about two years ago and had the exact experience you did. I have not been back. It left me feeling...... I don't think I can find the word. All my best L Of all the groups in the world, I would expect ours to be more welcoming since we are so marginalized. And I really am shocked that the you and infini had such suck-ass experiences. Usually, the women are the ones who get all the greetings and the guys are looked at like, "Oh another one, meh"
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Hello N, I went to a social here about two years ago and had the exact experience you did. I have not been back. It left me feeling...... I don't think I can find the word. All my best L
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6/23/2020 4:50 am |
While I do feel that there may be some local aspect of hospitality (In lived in NC for a while too), it really does come down to what leadership instills into the culture of a group. Yes, your host and the DM did approach you but, that that only indicates that those leaders posses a minimum of social decorum and expectation. When I lead a local munch group, I always made sure we started off the evening in some sort of group interaction. It could be some sort of topic on the lifestyle or even just...Cards Against Humanity. After a few rounds about the room, things would take off on their own. It's a comfort thing even for those who have been in the lifestyle for some time. There would always be that point in which people would start taking up conversation with those sitting next to them or even move to the other from across the room. I would sit back in that moment and smile to myself that I had accomplished what I intended...lead.
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While I do feel that there may be some local aspect of hospitality (In lived in NC for a while too), it really does come down to what leadership instills into the culture of a group. Yes, your host and the DM did approach you but, that that only indicates that those leaders posses a minimum of social decorum and expectation. When I lead a local munch group, I always made sure we started off the evening in some sort of group interaction. It could be some sort of topic on the lifestyle or even just...Cards Against Humanity. After a few rounds about the room, things would take off on their own. It's a comfort thing even for those who have been in the lifestyle for some time. There would always be that point in which people would start taking up conversation with those sitting next to them or even move to the other from across the room. I would sit back in that moment and smile to myself that I had accomplished what I intended...lead. Maybe I should visit NM
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6/24/2020 4:07 am |
Yes, I feel what you say is correct. Leadership sets the tone of social structure. It sounds like you are dedicated to making your group welcoming, and I do appreciate that as a submissive entering a new group especially. Maybe I should visit NM
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6/24/2020 4:46 pm |
Maybe you will Yes, I think I like this word.
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8/5/2020 11:08 am |
People should lend a hand.
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