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slaveheather1 36F
73 posts
6/2/2019 5:51 am
why do men view profiles of lesbians?


why do men (especially those with paid memberships) view, hotlist, flirt, or send friend requests, or email lesbian women? what do they hope to accomplish? Aside from getting themselves blocked, i can't think of a thing. Perhaps men should learn what the word lesbian means, either that learn to read and to think with their brain s, not that normally pitiful appendage between their legs. Dildos are always larger, and never go soft after 2 minutes

slynxy 46F  
8 posts
6/2/2019 10:33 am

They view them because lesbians are sexy ...

And flirt and write because they think they are only lesbian because they haven’t met them...

[image]


MrCanDo 56M
6 posts
6/2/2019 10:57 am

Many men who have been around the block a few times understand there's no such thing as a lesbian. Lesbians are just ordinary women who have been hurt, scared, or mistreated by the men in their lives.

Personally, I have no interest in them because the lesbians I've known have been, without exception, batshit crazy. Some hide it better than others, but even then it's just beneath the surface.

I realize you will disagree with all of this - but before you waste a lot of time writing stuff I won't read, ask yourself, "If lesbians were really all about sex with other women... why would they ever want a dildo?"

Good luck!


Subfantasy67 52M
522 posts
6/2/2019 11:16 am

Starting with the fact that we can't tell your sexual preferences from your picture, we have to look at your profile to find out anything about you.

I am mostly here for friends, chat, and blogs. Profiles are the doorway for that. (I have friends across the spectrum of sexuality)

Some men are only here for the pictures anyway.

And... I'm sure that some men believe they can "convert" you.


brandygirasol 50T
3970 posts
6/2/2019 11:42 am

Because MOST MEN around here are clueless about READing profiles FIRST to SEE what someone is into sexually before STUPIDLY diving in hitting on you ... Shall we just call them THE LOSERS


Gowron 64M
1167 posts
6/2/2019 11:46 am

Lesbians can be pretty. I don't mind looking at their pictures. Doesn't mean I'll try to contact them.

Curiously, a few lesbians take a look at my profile as well.

Also, I've got a close friend who's lesbian, so I often wonder "would she like this one?"


msfunfor 58M
3973 posts
6/2/2019 12:13 pm

hello ,
,,,sounds like a feud is about to errupt ?

can't wait for the repies

be good
M

.


kdom4whores2 60M
138 posts
6/2/2019 12:21 pm

Ha war has already begun here will have to keep an eye sounds like fun lol


marshamay 31F
2729 posts
6/2/2019 12:58 pm

They know they'll never have to make a commitment.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/2/2019 1:28 pm

typical responses from men, not realizing that most lesbians (an yes they do really exist) announce that they are lesbian in the first sentence of their profile, something anyone can see by placing the cursor on the picture and obtaining a quick view of said profile.


drmgirl622 64F  
10488 posts
6/2/2019 2:03 pm

I'm not getting into the war but it is true they have to view the profile to determine sexual preference. Now.....other than reading the profile no other contact is necessary. I do have male friends......operative word......friends.


Subfantasy67 52M
522 posts
6/2/2019 2:50 pm

Quick view still shows up as a profile hit.
I'm sorry. I thought you were asking an actual question, not just venting.

Have fun. I'll bow out gracefully now.


marshamay 31F
2729 posts
6/2/2019 4:22 pm

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    typical responses from men, not realizing that most lesbians (an yes they do really exist) announce that they are lesbian in the first sentence of their profile, something anyone can see by placing the cursor on the picture and obtaining a quick view of said profile.
the mouseover will show up as a view.


slynxy 46F  
8 posts
6/2/2019 5:28 pm

Not everyone was venting


CowboyRam 54M
3751 posts
6/2/2019 6:05 pm

I bet most of them are fakes, scammers, and they don't really care what the profile says; they send out lots of messages in hopes one will reply.

An ounce of doing is worth a pound of talk

Cowboy Up


McGripper 49M
3445 posts
6/2/2019 6:44 pm

Depends on the lesbian!

The opinions and understanding portrayed in my blog are mainly unfounded, misguided or wrong.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/3/2019 3:21 am

McGripper, then I guess there is no reason to read anything that you write in a blog, and btw, if you are ashamed to show an actual face pic on your profile, then odds say that you don't belong on this site.


DomInMD1953 64M  
123 posts
6/7/2019 4:08 pm

Because most men are lesbians trapped in a man's body.

"Strong women submit. The weak ones just give in." Copyright © 1993, 2013 B. Michael. All rights reserved.


Sweetsub4useAll 35M
17 posts
6/7/2019 5:46 pm

Well i for one find that observing the tender love between two sexy ladies is highly erotic .


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/8/2019 3:14 am

DominMD, if you are a man (or trapped in a man's body as you claim) then you are straight, not a lesbian. Sweetsub4useall, watch lesbian porn then, it doesn't give you the right to hit on, stalk, or harass a lesbian.


Sidcool1000 34M
1 post
6/8/2019 7:16 pm

En tout cas un vrai homme n'a pas besoin de lesbnienne


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/9/2019 2:59 am

Siscool1000, speak the international language: English, so all can know what you have to say.


LovingMasterIN 36M
23 posts
6/10/2019 4:32 pm

A few reasons

Alot of people (both men and women) do not both to read much of anything in the profile. They look at the pictures and then send a message, flirt, whatever.
And since lesbians frequently show up in the search results for "women seeking men" for whatever reason...

Alot of people (both men and women) are assholes and think they are something special and will be the one exception.

Then there are a ton of scam artists on these sites. I'm not convinced that anyone who has contacted me or whom I have exchanged messages with is an actual, genuine person. The scam artists tend to not pay much attention to the profile, they just send out as many messages/replies as possible.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/11/2019 2:58 am

While some ort all of that may be true, I wonder how one of those macho, straight males would feel about getting flirted with , emailed, IMed, hotlisted, receive a friend request from, or even just viewed by a gay man?


LovingMasterIN 36M
23 posts
6/11/2019 3:19 am

It happens. Alot, actually.
I just ignore it and move on.

There is also the possibility that they are legitimately interested in you and are just trying their luck. Like I said, lesbians do show up in search results for "women seeking men."


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/11/2019 5:02 am

well that is a problem that the site should correct


LovingMasterIN 36M
23 posts
6/11/2019 2:52 pm

Agreed, but I've run into it on other sites as well. Not sure why the algorithms sometimes do that.


Exhibitibi 51M/35F  

6/13/2019 6:35 am

My lesbian friends often look at straight women. A couple of them actively fancy a handful of famous women who have given no indication of being anything other than hetero.

It's unclear to me why anyone would take offence at having their profile looked at. If lesbians don't want males looking, then they should join a lesbian verified site.

Straight men look at lesbian profiles for the same reason that lesbian women look at straight women profiles. What they see might be attractive to them, even though unlikely to be attracted to them.

I think that if you restrict viewing privileges to those that you want to see you, you end up on a slippery slope. How about ugly women? Can they look? How ugly, exactly? How about denying access on the basis of other physical characteristics such as height or race?

I live in a sparesely populated area of Norway. I am not here to hook up. Most of the mails I get are from people thousands of kilometres away. So if I look at somebody's profile it may be because they have said something interesting in a blog or such. It doesn't mean that I think I can change their sexual persuasion to suit me. It would be a pity if people threw up walls to keep out people based on gender or other genetic features because BDSM has always been an inclusive and tolerant place. It would be nice if it could remain so.

Your kink or orientation don't have to be the same kink/orientation as mine for me to talk to you.

Lilli


FriendlyPain007 65M  
39 posts
6/13/2019 11:14 am

Although my profile clearly states that I am straight, several gay men have send me flirts, IMs and messages asking me to hurt them.

No big deal - we all are humans and as my mom taught me, we should tolerate others who are different from us even if we do not love them.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/14/2019 3:33 am

Ehhibitbi, i have seen a pic of a woman i find attractive, and ran the cursor over her pic, if it says that she is NOT seeking women, then i move on,

FriendlyPain007, while i understand a man doing what i just stated, what i have a problem with is the men who ignore the fact that i am only seeking women, and hotlist me, flirt with me, send a friend request, IM me or email me with a disgusting pic of t heir n inadequate family jewels telling me how they are going to convert or turn me into a cock hungry straight bitch.


sub_nouveau 50F
10657 posts
6/14/2019 5:17 am

I may be being presumptuous but I think you're asking to be respected, and that's what a lot of us would like, and don't receive here. I get annoyed that people keep disregarded my relationship and expect me to leave My Sir to join them. Ridiculous! Typically I delete & block.

The reality though is that a lot of people treat Alt as an online shopping catalogue: they see a pic they like and think they can order it, direct to their home.

Let's talk. It's how we learn about yesterday and comprehend today.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/14/2019 6:43 am

Good point, i am NOT eye candy for the masses.


Exhibitibi 51M/35F  

6/14/2019 7:56 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    Ehhibitbi, i have seen a pic of a woman i find attractive, and ran the cursor over her pic, if it says that she is NOT seeking women, then i move on,

    FriendlyPain007, while i understand a man doing what i just stated, what i have a problem with is the men who ignore the fact that i am only seeking women, and hotlist me, flirt with me, send a friend request, IM me or email me with a disgusting pic of t heir n inadequate family jewels telling me how they are going to convert or turn me into a cock hungry straight bitch.
I understand that doing that *still* shows up as a profile view. Unfortunately, not everyone shows as much restraint as you.

The rest of what you say is completely different. I don't see a reason to object to my profile being viewed by other members of a site that I haven't specifically blocked by username.

I do see every reason to object to harrassment. The easiest approach is the block button, of course. I tend to reply to those who write drivel to me. If they get obnoxious, my dominant partner replies. They quickly go away.

This isn't limited to men contacting the profiles of lesbians, of course. Lots of people here - of all ages, genders and orientations have delusions about their status and desirability. Lots of people also view this place as a magical room where they are the only real person and everyone else is here to service their fantasy. I get sick of people claiming to be superior dominants or even pro-dommes wanting to teach me more than Troy ever could. Yeah.. in their dreams.

We all get to suffer them at some point.

So I am right alongside you in being annoyed at messages that sluice other people's fantasies that don't gel with mine into my inbox.

I just think we should blame fantasists and sociopaths and inadequates of all genders and orientations rather than simply hate men for it. It's not as if they are the only culprits - they just happen to be the largest chunk of the membership here.

I wish we could uninvent the concept of online BDSM. I don't mind if both sides are aware and want to be a part of it, but people pretending to be different genders and stuff? Give me a break. I like the real stuff, thanks. That's what puts most of the pests off.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/14/2019 10:08 am

I agree with You, and i don't hate men, i just n ignore them until they get obnoxious, then i say something about their lack of sensibility.


bdst1 59M
695 posts
6/15/2019 11:01 am

Well I clicked on your profile after reading your block post, so I will count as a profile view. Lots of lesbians here post blog posts for all to read, whatever their gender or sexuality. and, like other blog posts, they are sometimes interesting and sometimes not. If we only communicated (in Alt or anywhere else) with people who we were sexually interested in, or vice versa, the world would be a poorer place.

In terms of why straight males hotlist or flirt with you, I am sure plenty of straight males, sub, dom or switch, have lesbian fantasies of some sort. Male porn is full of girl-on-girl action. Some people struggle to separate fantasy from reality. I wouldn't take offence or get too wound up over it.

Contact me privately via the PM at the head of my blog page


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/15/2019 12:18 pm

bdst1, thanks but no thanks


Bigdaddy4kink 42M
10 posts
6/15/2019 4:39 pm

Forbidden fruit


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/16/2019 3:15 am

typical statement from a man objectifying a female, we are human beings not pieces of fruit.


TheGentleD0M 50M
3402 posts
6/16/2019 4:11 am

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Unless your name is Lezbo99, there's no way to know you are lez until I read your profile. The real argument comes if they hotlist you. And the answer there is they probably like your picture.


tgd


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/16/2019 7:16 am

If they pay for a membership to this site, then they should take advantage of their right to read a profile before they do anything else. I am also pretty7 sure that even Lesbo99 suffers the same problems as other lesb ians on the site.


TheGentleD0M 50M
3402 posts
6/16/2019 1:31 pm

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    If they pay for a membership to this site, then they should take advantage of their right to read a profile before they do anything else. I am also pretty7 sure that even Lesbo99 suffers the same problems as other lesb ians on the site.
I in fact dated Lezbo99 for 6 months last year and she reported then that she gets minimal male interest.

Thanks for responding.


tgd


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/17/2019 4:43 am

Good for you, and good to hear that she gets minimal interest, though your claim of dating her seems rather doubtful


TheGentleD0M 50M
3402 posts
6/17/2019 6:57 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    Good for you, and good to hear that she gets minimal interest, though your claim of dating her seems rather doubtful
Lezbo99 loved the subtlety of my sense of humor.

Thanks for responding.


tgd


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/17/2019 11:01 am

what sense of humor?


Sucker4Ever 71M
6139 posts
6/17/2019 8:02 pm

I wouldn't want you if you were straight, loved little dicks and couldn't resist me!

You're too full of yourself, and usually that means you're full of . . .Well, what's the point?

I know/see that you are blonde. But are you really saying that a man cannot contact you with intentions of being friends? Sounds that way. And that makes you suck in my MAN book.

The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around. Thomas A. Edison


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/18/2019 4:24 am

why would i want to be friends with someone like you?


Nisei_amai 55M
27 posts
6/18/2019 6:04 am

For Me. It seems to be a 'mouse over' problem.

N_a/TTM/Master Ron


Aqualung 68M
56 posts
6/18/2019 7:20 am

One night with me, girl, and you'll be cured of all that lesbian silliness like many before.

Illegitimi non carborundum.

"Thou goest to woman? Don't forget thy whip." Nietzsche


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/18/2019 7:42 am

lesbian silliness? that tells me all that i need to know about your lack of intelligence Nisei_amai. Aqualung, quoting Neitzsche doesn't mean that you are intelligent, just that you can barely read, comprehending what you read is still in doubt for you though.


goddesssherry1 49T
4 posts
6/18/2019 8:23 am

i am a t girl and find lots of lesbians love girls like me and i relate more to lesbians too I do lots of gurl on gurl sex but so wish i was a full time girls so i could be a lesbian.It's just a huge turn on for me but if you aren't into gurls like me thats cool too i just leave you alone.I find that ALT has something for everyone so just lay back and enjoy the site and never fight just give love to everyone

GODDESSSHERRY1


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/18/2019 10:24 am

while you are right that i am only interestyed in women thast were born female, i respect6 your right t o live as you feel is b est for you.


cpitch 58M
35 posts
6/20/2019 9:52 am

Eye candy is always a wonderful thing!


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/23/2019 5:46 am

Typical response from a male who thinks of women only as objects and not as the people that they are


Eli__ 110M
3111 posts
6/23/2019 11:44 am

    Quoting MrCanDo:
    Many men who have been around the block a few times understand there's no such thing as a lesbian. Lesbians are just ordinary women who have been hurt, scared, or mistreated by the men in their lives.

    Personally, I have no interest in them because the lesbians I've known have been, without exception, batshit crazy. Some hide it better than others, but even then it's just beneath the surface.

    I realize you will disagree with all of this - but before you waste a lot of time writing stuff I won't read, ask yourself, "If lesbians were really all about sex with other women... why would they ever want a dildo?"

    Good luck!

that's one of the biggest loads of horse shit i've read in alt in quite awhile...good luck!



"doing drivebys in Mayberry since 1955"


Eli__ 110M
3111 posts
6/23/2019 11:45 am

    Quoting Exhibitibi:
    My lesbian friends often look at straight women. A couple of them actively fancy a handful of famous women who have given no indication of being anything other than hetero.

    It's unclear to me why anyone would take offence at having their profile looked at. If lesbians don't want males looking, then they should join a lesbian verified site.

    Straight men look at lesbian profiles for the same reason that lesbian women look at straight women profiles. What they see might be attractive to them, even though unlikely to be attracted to them.

    I think that if you restrict viewing privileges to those that you want to see you, you end up on a slippery slope. How about ugly women? Can they look? How ugly, exactly? How about denying access on the basis of other physical characteristics such as height or race?

    I live in a sparesely populated area of Norway. I am not here to hook up. Most of the mails I get are from people thousands of kilometres away. So if I look at somebody's profile it may be because they have said something interesting in a blog or such. It doesn't mean that I think I can change their sexual persuasion to suit me. It would be a pity if people threw up walls to keep out people based on gender or other genetic features because BDSM has always been an inclusive and tolerant place. It would be nice if it could remain so.

    Your kink or orientation don't have to be the same kink/orientation as mine for me to talk to you.

    Lilli

waves ...good to see you and the posse still here Lilli



"doing drivebys in Mayberry since 1955"


Eli__ 110M
3111 posts
6/23/2019 11:52 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    While some ort all of that may be true, I wonder how one of those macho, straight males would feel about getting flirted with , emailed, IMed, hotlisted, receive a friend request from, or even just viewed by a gay man?

i'm a straight dominant sadist...i get lesbian,domme,trans alt matches on my page despite the search settings i selected...i also get flirts,hotlists and mail from dommes and trans folk.....i however politely decline email offers and ignore a harmless wink or hotlist ...sometimes a few of these folks have become friends and i've enjoyed chatting with them

sounds like you'd rather be a victim rather than a adult...the irony of a attractive profile pic garnering attention on the world wide web isn't lost on you i hope...have a nice day


"doing drivebys in Mayberry since 1955"


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/23/2019 2:02 pm

why do lesbbians use dildos? because sometimes a tongue isn't quite enough, and a fist is too much.


pontii5 51M
12 posts
6/23/2019 11:13 pm

Because most men are jackasses & have fantasies


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/24/2019 3:55 am

Aren't there enough straight or bisexual women for men to fantasize about?


Exhibitibi 51M/35F  

6/24/2019 6:31 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    Aren't there enough straight or bisexual women for men to fantasize about?
I doubt it.

Just as some lesbians I know fantasise about turning a straight girl, some men fantasise about turning a lesbian and some straight girls fantasise about turnng a gay guy etc.

It's a fact of life that anyone who puts up a pretty picture is going to be fantasised about by someone they are not attracted to. I don't understand why anyone would want to make such a big deal about it.

If a human finds you desirable. Take it as a compliment. You don't have to enter a long term physical relationship with them. If you get messaged, then there's the option of a template message you can send back thanking them for their interest but as they are the wrong gender/age/location/religion/diet/hair colour or whatever, you don't want to take the conversation further but wish them luck.

Takes a minute to write and each one takes a second to send.

You originally asked why men look at the profiles of lesbians. You had quite a few suggestions from men as to why they night do it. Some may have been tongue in cheek or trolling, but there's truth in each. But pretty much every such answer you dismissed. That's why I wondered about the 'hating men' part; you either don't want to know the answers or your question is an excuse for misandry. That's how it looks to me - so it may look even moreso like that to men.

Lilli
x


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/24/2019 6:47 am

This must have been written by the male half of the couple. Dismiss anything that a female has to say as irrelevant or unimportant because a female voiced her opinion.


Hott4heels72 46M  
10 posts
6/25/2019 3:05 am

Well Heather, I cannot speak for anyone else. However I do look at a lot of profiles. My profile comes up as a man. I am a cross dresser. Sometimes I look at women profile just to see style. I do not nessesarily look at their preference always. But I do admire anyone who is happy with them self. I might click the like of the picture, but it's just to let you know.,hey you look great. Not trying to flirt or that. But most people need to learn respect. I believe that is most of the issue. I hope you have a great day


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/25/2019 5:15 am

same to you, and style is dependent on your season whether it be winter spring, summer or fall


jstbrte1 48M
41 posts
6/25/2019 6:12 am

it's a very pointless action if you ask me. why look at what you can't have?


Exhibitibi 51M/35F  

6/25/2019 9:21 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    This must have been written by the male half of the couple. Dismiss anything that a female has to say as irrelevant or unimportant because a female voiced her opinion.
And there is the proof of the misandry.

I wrote it. I am definitely female. That's why I signed it. Troy signs his own name and is very rarely here.

Clearly, it really upsets you that a woman can have a different opinion to you. I think you are just seeking negative attention and you are indulging in a spot of trolling to try and get it. That is really how you are coming across with your offensive responses to people who simply suggested answers to your question, but happened to be male.

By your logic, your response which dismissed anything that I had to say must have been written by a male.

So you can either confess that you are a man or you can admit that you are demonstrably wrong. Or both.

Of course, I suspect, you will choose to do neither.

Having been bi- for a number of years and having had two reasonably long term relationships with girls, I have a pretty shrewd clue about what things attract one woman to another. Misandry and a victim mentality ain't two of them, generally, and I haven't found a lesbian who behaves this way outside comic books.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/25/2019 11:01 am

i am neither wrong, nor male, and just because someone claims to be the female half of a couple does not automatically mean that they are telling the truth, which is what i suspect from you.


Exhibitibi 51M/35F  

6/25/2019 11:25 am

    Quoting slaveheather1:
    i am neither wrong, nor male, and just because someone claims to be the female half of a couple does not automatically mean that they are telling the truth, which is what i suspect from you.
You do talk such twaddle in order to run away from being outed. You are lashing out with baseless accusations because you've been called on misandry and trolling. Your 'suspicions' are laughable. What's next? Are you going to accuse me of being Hitler? The Illuminati? Maybe I am a man in drag?

Having established for the wider audience that your posts *do* indicate man-hating, that your attention-seeking need is such that you are trolling members in order to be insulting in your replies, I am going to leave you to it. This discussion is worthless.

Lilli
Not Troy.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/25/2019 1:07 pm

as are you


Atta_boy 54M  
4 posts
6/29/2019 5:02 am

This string is very interesting. A lot of assumptions, jabs, and anger. What did you expect when posting this originally? Just curious. Maybe you should have postulated in a way that gave you the feedback you wanted, unless of course you wanted this.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/29/2019 6:16 am

I wanted to find out why men dismiss lesbianism as just a phase that women could go through while waiting for the right guy to come along, being a lesbian doesn't mean that you are waiting for the right guy, it means that you are looking for the right girl to come along,, if you have not already found her.


Atta_boy 54M  
4 posts
6/29/2019 6:37 am

Okay, thanks for clarifying your question, and a good one at that. Thank you. I suppose it may be because humans, men perhaps especially so, are a myopic species. I often think that (especially in terms of the biosphere and and non human life in general) that they don't view themselves as part of a greater and complex system of life and in the case of man/woman as a partner or a friend or companion. I think we have evolved very rapidly over the last one or two hundred years and our hunter gatherer brains have not changed as quickly.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/29/2019 8:10 am

you have a good theory there, though you also have to take into account that there are quite a number of men who see themselves as v the ultimate male and believe t hat no woman could resist their supposed charm, you know who i mean , the macho men, and others like a certain high ranking official in our nation's government who think that women were put on the earth to be seduced by him simply due to his riches, one who could afford to pay a doctor to keep him from serving the country that he claims that he loves so much, yet serving in the military was beneath him.


Atta_boy 54M  
4 posts
6/29/2019 9:08 am

So true. AKA narcissistic bully. I left the States, and took up residency in France. Not because of the Mango In Chief, but it certainly was icing on the cake. It's prevalent throughout society. Italy has Berlusconi and the list goes on. Neanderthals. It's one thing to have to deal with this on a day to day level and quite another when it is a top level official, like you said, and he empowers all the minions. I am truly sorry for my fellow 'man'. I do appreciate your candor and discussion, though.


slaveheather1 36F
28 posts
6/29/2019 10:28 am

Yours as well.



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